When your world is upside down
by Resonance and d
Summary: Sora isn't a bad guy, no matter how things might look. Superhero AU. Background Roxas/Axel, otherwise gen.
1. Something wrong

There was a knock on the door right after Sora got home from school. Sora opened it to find Riku standing there. His hair was dripping wet from the rain outside, and his clothes were sticking to him, and the overall effect was that he looked kind of miserable. Then again, Riku always looked like that, these days. Some lingering effect of being "tainted" with Ansem's soul, or maybe just because he felt bad about the things he'd done while he was possessed. In any case, he hardly ever looked happy anymore.

"I know who the last member of Organization 13 is," Riku said, staring at Sora far too morosely for someone who had good news. "I think I've known for a long time. I just didn't want to be right." He didn't move to come in. He just stood there, barely sheltered by the roof's overhang.

"Well?" Sora asked. "Who is it? Don't look so worried- it can't be that bad. We've taken down Ansem already- there can't be anyone more powerful than him in their ranks, right? I mean, he had that whole soul thing going on."

He expected Riku to cheer up. It didn't work, probably because Riku now had the soul thing going on, having absorbed Ansem's powers during the whole possession event last year.

"It's you," Riku said flatly. "You're the last member of Organization 13."

Sora laughed. "Good one, Riku."

Riku's face remained sad, and a little angry. Sora's laughter died. "Wait- you're serious? Riku, I'd never join Organization 13. I'm one of the good guys, remember? I wouldn't be a supervillain."

Riku said, "Tell me, Sora, what were you doing at nine last night?"

"Doing homework," Sora answered, genuinely puzzled.

"Funny. I called your house around then, and your mom picked up. She said you'd stepped out."

Sora frowned. "What?"

"You know, I didn't see you turn in any homework today, either."

Sora opened his mouth. He closed it.

He felt like the facts were escaping him. Because yeah, he remembered doing homework last night, for hours. But he also knew that Riku was right- he hadn't had anything to turn in today. And he didn't know how both of those things could be true at the same time. Even Sora wasn't that bad at homework.

"I don't understand," Sora said.

"I saw you," Riku snapped. "Your mask slipped. I saw your face, Sora. Stop playing dumb."

Sora just shook his head, feeling like the world was slipping out from under him. He'd been doing homework. He wasn't a supervillain. He was a hero. He hadn't been out last night. He'd been safe in his room, trying to pull his grades up enough that he didn't have to repeat this year (again).

"I think that there's something wrong with me," Sora said, feeling suddenly dizzy. "Riku-"

And then there was a feeling like someone pulling him backwards, and his own voice said, "Dammit, you had to let him know something was wrong, didn't you?"

And then there was a bright light, and Sora's last thought before he whited out was that this was way more familiar than it should be.

Then he was gone.


	2. The basement

Sora woke up handcuffed, in total darkness, bruised and aching.

"Huh?" he tried to say, but it came out as more of a pained moan.

It took him a couple minutes to get his bearings. It was damp where he was, and once his eyes were adjusted he could see that there was a faint patch of light over there, probably coming from under a door over there, and it was also illuminating a box over there. Then he recognized where he was; it was Riku's basement. They'd played down here often enough when they were kids that Sora knew it well, though apparently not well enough to recognize it in total darkness.

It took a moment longer to remember the last thing that had happened. His voice saying things all on its own. Memories suddenly floating to the surface, Riku saying he was the last member of Organization 13-

It didn't make any sense.

"Riku?" he said.

But only silence answered him.

"He won't come," his own voice said, after a moment.

Sora just about jumped out of his skin.

"I tried pretending to be you," the other continued casually. "It worked for a little while. But now he won't come down except to bring us meals."

Sora tested the handcuffs nervously, and found that his left arm was securely cuffed to a pole. Good. Whatever was hiding inside of him, he didn't want it to be able to hurt anyone.

"Who are you?" Sora asked. "Why are you possessing me? What do you want?"

Again, silence, and Sora thought that he wasn't going to get an answer. But then, slowly, the other said, "My name is Roxas. I want to know why I'm here, too. And I'm not possessing you. At least, if I am, it isn't on purpose."

"Then what are you doing in my brain?"

His head shook, all on its own. "I don't know, but I'm going to find out."

That was all the talking that Roxas seemed to want to do. Sora spent the next hour wondering exactly how long Roxas had been possessing him, how long he'd been part of Organization 13 without knowing it, if Roxas had hurt anyone using Sora's body.

This was really bad.

It was in the middle of all those thoughts that Riku came down the stairs and turned on the light. He was carrying a tray of food.

"Riku!" Sora said.

Riku's expression was hard, and Sora remembered that Roxas had said that he'd been pretending to be Sora, before. Riku couldn't know that Sora was really himself now.

And Roxas could still be listening.

"Don't tell me anything important," Sora said in a rush. "I don't know if he can hear."

Riku's expression softened, but only by a hair. He set the food next to Sora carefully.

"How long have I been here?" Sora asked. "What happened?"

"We fought," Riku said. "I won, and dragged you down here. You've been here two days."

"Are you hurt at all?" Sora asked. "I'm sorry, Riku, if I'd known something was this wrong, I would have- I don't know, handcuffed myself, probably."

"It's not your fault," Riku said, expression still stony. And Sora thought, how good had Roxas been at impersonating him, that Riku still wasn't sure?

"Do you have a plan?" Sora asked. "Don't tell me what it is, if you do. But- do you have one?"

"I do," Riku said. He stood there awkwardly for a moment, obviously unsure how much more to say. "Don't worry, Sora. If that's you. I'm going to get that thing out of you. You won't be trapped much longer."

Sora nodded. His stomach rumbled, and he grabbed a slice of bread from the tray Riku had brought down. It was toasted, with more butter than was really healthy, just like Sora liked it.

"Thank you," he said.

The soup that came with the bread was lukewarm, and Sora was glad- it meant that Roxas couldn't throw it in Riku's face. Couldn't hurt Riku- any more than he already had, anyway, just by being there, and lying, and pretending to be Sora.

Sora didn't like it when people hurt his friends.

"His name is Roxas," Sora said. "The thing possessing me. We had- a little bit of a conversation, earlier. I don't know if he told you anything."

"He claims he isn't possessing you at all," Riku said.

"Yeah," Sora said. "He told me that, too. That it wasn't on purpose. I don't know what he meant by it, though. He didn't explain any more than that."

He took a long sip of soup. He was hungry. Whatever had happened in the past few days, apparently eating hadn't been a big factor.

"I'm going to figure this out," Riku told him. "We're going to free you, Sora."

He gathered up Sora's empty dishes. With one fleeting glance back, he returned upstairs.

This time he left the dim light bulb in the corner on. It didn't do much besides make shadows, but at least Sora wasn't totally in the dark now.

* * *

><p>The first day was the worst. Riku came down three times more to let Sora eat and to use the bathroom in the corner of the basement. Once, Roxas tried to make a break for it. Riku tackled him to the ground, managed to handcuff the two of them together while Roxas fought every motion, scratching and punching with his free hand and biting when that failed.<p>

Sora's body wasn't all that strong unless he was borrowing someone else's superstrength. Apparently Roxas didn't know how to do that, or maybe he couldn't use Sora's powers at all, but in any case, he was stuck with Sora's base strength, and Sora was a good five inches shorter than Riku.

Sora never thought he'd be glad to be so much weaker than Riku. But as Riku dragged him back to the basement, Sora couldn't help but be grateful.

After that, Riku kept Sora handcuffed to either him or the pole in the basement at all times, even when Sora was himself.

Not that Sora always was himself, when he claimed to be. Roxas hadn't given up on pretending. He tried to wheedle information out of Riku, to figure out his plans for getting rid of Roxas, to find out the movements of other superheroes and villains. Riku always figured it out before Roxas got anything important, and then Sora would be himself again. Sometimes he whited out during those moments. Sometimes, horribly, he was trapped in his own mind, able to feel and see everything Roxas felt and saw, but unable to do anything about it. More and more, it was the latter.

"I'm sorry," Sora would say, when he was himself again. "I can't seem to stop him- I wish I could, but I can't seem to fight him off."

"It's okay," Riku would say. And then he would put the key to the cuffs carefully out of reach, and come over to Sora to hold his hand awkwardly. "We'll fix this, I promise."

After the first day, it was a little better. Riku brought Sora his textbooks, and told him what the homework was for the day. His homework was too hard without someone to explain it to him, and it was boring to boot, but it was better than sitting in the dark with no one but Roxas to keep him company.

He wondered what Riku did with the homework, when Sora had completed it. Did he turn it in? What had he told the teachers about Sora's absence? What had he told Sora's mom? Sora had never told her he was a super, let alone a meta. Sora wanted to ask those questions, but he wasn't sure he'd like the answers, so he didn't.

On the third day, Kairi came to see him.

"Oh, Sora," she said. She looked at Riku. "He is Sora right now, right?"

Riku shrugged. "Talk to him. It's the only way to tell. But be careful. He's not safe, even when he's Sora. Roxas can take over at any moment."

Kairi stood a few steps away. "Sora?"

"Hi, Kairi," Sora said, smiling weakly.

She took a few steps closer, staying just out of reach.

"You shouldn't have come," Roxas said, and Sora was at the back of his mind again, unable to do anything but watch. "I'm dangerous right now."

"Don't be silly," Kairi said. "I couldn't just leave you down here alone, could I?"

Sora tried desperately to take control, to shout that Roxas was up to something. But as usual, he was powerless to do anything.

"Thank you," Roxas said, and Sora couldn't believe that they were falling for this. Didn't Roxas' smile look as fake as it felt on Sora's mouth?

Kairi took a step closer. Riku did nothing to stop her, and Sora struggled even harder to keep Roxas from doing something evil. If he could do so much as twitch weirdly, they might suspect something was wrong.

Nothing.

Kairi closed the distance between them, grabbed Sora, and hugged him tightly. Roxas held her in return with his free arm. But when she tried to pull away, Roxas grabbed her free hand, pulled her closer, and held her arm, all pretense of smiling gone.

What was he planning on doing? He only had one free hand. What on Earth could he do to Kairi like that? It didn't make sense.

Then his hand started to glow.

"The hell?" Riku said, taking a step closer.

"You're going to unlock the handcuffs now," Roxas said. "Or I leave a nasty scar on Kairi's arm. I may not be able to use my powers much in this godforsaken basement, but I can make her hurt."

His hand glowed brighter. Kairi shrieked.

"Fine!" Riku said. "You win! Let Kairi go!"

"Not until I'm free," Roxas said. But his hand dimmed, and Sora's heart stopped beating so fast.

Riku undid the handcuffs while Roxas kept a tight hold on Kairi's wrist. She tried to struggle away a couple of times, but when she did, Roxas increased the intensity of the glowing, making her wince and stop. Sora couldn't feel any heat or anything, but probably that was because his body was being used as the conduit for Roxas' power- whatever it was.

"Now back off," Roxas told Riku. "Into the corner, but stay where I can see you."

Riku backed up, eyes never leaving Roxas.

"I'll let go of her when I'm far enough away," Roxas told Riku, and Sora noticed that as he talked, his grip loosened slightly.

It was a stupid way to hold someone, anyway. If Roxas' attention slipped for more than a minute-

-and yeah, Kairi had noticed, too. She twisted her arm, hissing as Roxas' hand glowed brighter, and then she was free.

Internally, Sora cheered. Kairi might not have superpowers, but she wasn't helpless.

Take that, Sora thought, in Roxas' general direction.

Roxas, who had been making to grab Kairi again, froze.

"What?" he said.

And then Riku was in Sora's face, and slammed Roxas against the wall with superhuman strength.

It hurt. And Sora thought that wasn't really fair, when it was Roxas who'd been threatening people. But it was necessary, and even through the pain, Sora was glad Roxas was getting his comeuppance for threatening to hurt Kairi.

Roxas didn't take long to recover. He fell into a roll, and made his way to a dusty patch of sunlight falling from the dirty window. Then he grinned a grin that felt evil and wrong on Sora's face.

Riku tackled him again, pinning one of his arms to the ground and reaching for the other. But Roxas squirmed, and Riku couldn't quite get hold of his other arm. Roxas made a scooping motion with his free hand, and that was weird, like he was trying to catch dust particles from the beam of sunlight, only why would he bother to do that in the middle of a fight? And then he pressed his hand gently to Riku's face, and shut his own eyes tightly-

The flash of light was enough that it was bright even through Sora's closed eyelids. Riku was stunned, and his grip on Roxas' other arm loosened. Roxas was able to kick his way out from under Riku, and he stood, took one step towards the stairs-

Pain blossomed in Sora's head, and the last thing he saw as he crumpled backwards to the ground was Kairi, looking grim and standing over him with a section of pipe.

* * *

><p>He woke up what was probably a few minutes later, cuffed to the pole once more. Riku was sitting on the stairs, rubbing at his eyes. Kairi had found some boards and was nailing them over the window by the stairs.<p>

Sora wasn't just going to be locked up here for the foreseeable future. He was going to be locked up here in total darkness.

Panic rushed through his body. His chest felt tight. There wasn't enough air, suddenly. And then he moaned, but it wasn't him. It was Roxas. Roxas was the one panicking. Roxas was panicking, and Sora could feel it.

He'd thought this whole possession thing couldn't get any worse. He'd been wrong.

"Are you okay?" Kairi asked, turning around when she heard Sora stir. "I'm sorry for hitting so hard. I suppose I was a bit angry."

"Don't leave me in the dark," Roxas said. "Please- I'm sorry I threatened you, but I wouldn't really have done any harm to you- I don't do stuff like that, I'm a spy, not a torturer or assassin or anything- please-"

Sora didn't know how much of that was true. But he did know that his heart was racing, and he was breathing hard, and that told him that Roxas' panic wasn't fake.

"Please," Roxas repeated.

Riku, still rubbing at his eyes, did not look impressed. Kairi turned to him and said, "He's afraid. Riku- is this really right? Treating him this way?"

"He's the one possessing Sora," Riku said harshly. "If he'd just let him go, none of this would be necessary."

"I don't know how," Roxas said. "I don't have a clue, I just woke up in this body, I don't know how I got here. Please don't keep me in the dark. Exorcise me or do whatever you have to, but not that."

"Isn't exorcism for ghosts?" Kairi asked. "Are you a ghost, Roxas?"

"No such thing," said Riku, finally standing up. "People are bad enough. I would know. There's no need to make up worse things to worry about."

Kairi turned back to Roxas. "Do you know what you are?"

Roxas was calming down a little now that the immediate threat of the windows being boarded up had passed.

"I'm a person. Just- one that happens to be inside your friend, unfortunately. And anything beyond that- how would I know? It's not like I woke up with an instruction manual."

Riku scoffed, and walked up the stairs.

"Wait, Riku," Kairi said. Then, with an apologetic look at Roxas, she followed.

The window was still half-unboarded. But from the sliver of sky Sora could see, he could tell it would get dark out soon. He watched the light fade over the next hour or so, until the only light in the basement was the line of it at the bottom of the door that lead upstairs- the one that led to the kitchen.

That kitchen might as well be the moon, for all the good it did Sora. His whole world had been narrowed to a point. The furthest he ever made it was the bathroom in the corner of the basement.

"Distract me," Roxas said. It was only then that Sora noticed his hands were clenched into fists, his nails digging into his palms. He wasn't quite panicking- not yet- but he was definitely on edge.

"Why should I do you any favors?" Sora asked. "As far as I can tell, you've done nothing but cause me problems."

"You're nice," Roxas said, shifting a little where he sat. "Too nice. You don't want me to be miserable."

Sora sighed. It was true. Even though Roxas had taken over his body and utterly ruined his life, Sora didn't hate him. Because Roxas was a person, and Sora had never been able to hate anyone, and Roxas didn't even seem to want to be in Sora's body, and he hadn't been planning on really hurting Kairi (said he hadn't really been planning on hurting Kairi, Sora remembered- that was hardly a guarantee even if it felt true), and he was alone and afraid here even if he didn't want to show it.

Plus, Roxas being miserable was pretty uncomfortable for Sora, too.

"Fine," Sora said. "I'll distract you. Er- I guess you already know all about me, so no surprises there."

He had to pause then to let Roxas give a little scoff.

"Well, you do," Sora said. "You've been spying on me for who knows how long."

"Since I woke up," Roxas said evasively.

"Right. And all I know about you is that you're working for Organization 13, and that you're terrified of the dark."

"I wouldn't say terrified," Roxas protested.

Sora was pointedly silent.

"I was fine with it at first," Roxas said. "Until I discovered my powers."

"What happened?"

Roxas paused, as though unsure whether he should continue.

He didn't trust Sora. The feeling was mutual.

Roxas shrugged. "I can protect myself at night," he said. "Sort of. If I get enough sun during the day. But I'm still not as strong in the dark as in the light. There have been some close calls. I have a reason to be afraid of the dark."

He rattled the handcuffs irritably. "And if I had direct sunlight to power me, I would be able to get rid of these damn handcuffs. I would cut my way right through them like they were butter."

Sora could probably super-strength his way out of the handcuffs without much problem, though it would hurt like heck. He didn't mention this to Roxas, in case it gave him ideas about trying to use Sora's powers. Roxas hadn't shown any ability to do that, yet- but Sora wasn't going to take chances.

"I hate this," Roxas said. "I hate being trapped. I hate being alone. I hate the darkness."

Then he went quiet except for the ragged sound of his breathing.

"Why are you even part of the Organization?" Sora asked. "If you switched sides, you could be free. We could find a way to get you out of my head safely. And you wouldn't have to watch yourself so carefully. Riku and Kairi would protect you when it was dark out- so would I- and-

His mouth snapped shut. Roxas had apparently decided to silence him. "No. Just- no. I have my reasons for being a part of the Organization. Don't try to change my mind."

Since this was obviously a touchy subject, Sora decided to switch topics and come back to it later. He wasn't going to give up, though. He had to make Roxas at least consider not being a supervillain. It would make life so much easier.

"So- do you have any hobbies?" Sora asked, in a less-than-elegant change of topics.

"No," Roxas said. "When would I have time, between the Organization and pretending to be you?"

"Oh. Um. So- evildoing is your hobby, then, I guess."

Roxas sighed. "I am not an 'evildoer'," he said. "The Organization does a lot of morally gray stuff, I'll admit. But it also does a lot of good. We're cleaning up the streets of Destiny Islands. Do you know how many supervillains we've eliminated? You need to realize that there's a lot of moral complexity out there."

"You know who likes to talk about moral complexity?" Sora said. "Evil people, that's who."

"You're a huge idiot," Roxas said.

"I was kidding," Sora said. "Mostly. I mean, I pretty much have to be against the Organization. They kidnapped Kairi and tried to kill me. Your old leader took over Riku's body and soul and nearly erased him. They're still up to something and I don't know what."

To that, Roxas had no response. Sora should have known better than to expect one, from the person possessing him.

Eventually Sora fell asleep. He woke up aching. The floor of the basement was cold and uncomfortable, and the handcuffs keeping his left arm anchored to the pole were hardly helping.

He sat up, and rubbed his hands together to warm them up.

Sora realized that he had no idea what day it was. The disorientation was... well, not as bad as he'd expected. His head felt so much clearer than it had in a long time. Probably because his memories hadn't been tampered with in a while. It was like he'd been looking at everything through a haze that had finally lifted.

It was a sobering realization, that he felt more like himself than he could remember feeling in- god, in months.

He shivered a little, the cold of the basement getting to him. He'd have to ask Riku for a blanket when he came down with breakfast.

He waited quietly, knees drawn up toward himself. It was still dark out- it would be at least another hour before Riku came.

Was Roxas awake? Usually he didn't let Sora have this much control unless he was planning something. Maybe he just didn't want to deal with the cold and the dark. Sora didn't want to deal with it either, but he didn't have a choice in the matter.

Being awake for this possession was way worse than sleeping through it. He just had to hope that eventually he worked out a way to fight through it.

After a while, the silence got to Sora, too. He'd always hated being alone.

"Roxas?" he said, hating himself a little. Roxas was the enemy. He wasn't supposed to be company for Sora. Sora wanted him gone. But- Sora had always hated being alone. Even the company of an evil member of the Organization was preferable to no company at all. Even if it did mean that Sora lost part of his control over his body. He was getting used to that, anyway.

It took a while for Roxas to respond. When he did, he yawned. So- maybe he had been sleeping. Or maybe he wanted Sora to think he had been.

Sora hated mind games. But sometimes they were inevitable. He decided to say nothing. All he'd get were lies if he asked.

"What?" Roxas asked. He sounded... surprised.

"I didn't want to be alone," Sora said. "I don't like you. I don't think we could like each other. But- I don't want to be in this basement alone."

"Now who's scared of the dark?" Roxas said.

"It's not that," Sora said. "It's just- you're not the only one who's cut off from the source of your power, you know."

"What?"

"My friends are my power," Sora said, after a long moment deciding how much to say. "You must know that. You spied on me for long enough. And now they don't trust me. They can't- you made sure of that. And now I'm all alone."

"Poor you," Roxas said, but he didn't sound as unsympathetic as he sounded like he was trying to be. Then, more seriously, he added, "No one has ever trusted me. In the Organization. Even my best friend seems to worry that I'm going to turn traitor. Because of you. I could never be trusted, in case I lost control of you."

Sora felt the absurd urge to apologize. He resisted it.

"Not my fault," he said, a little stiffly. "And for the record? I'm not too pleased with being controlled."

There was a long silence.

"I can't say I'm sorry," Roxas said. "I'm doing what I have to, to survive. You'd do the same if you had to."

"I wouldn't possess anyone to start with," Sora said. "So it's stupid to argue about it."

More silence. Sora imagined Roxas was just barely restraining himself from shouting "I'm not trying to possess you!" Roxas seemed kind of hung up on that point.

Come to think of it, how was Roxas possessing him in the first place? If his powers were light-related, and not soul-related, how had he managed it?

Maybe someone else had put Roxas in Sora's body. Ansem, maybe. He'd shattered Sora's soul once- maybe he'd decided to put another one in there while Sora was sleeping, before he'd recovered.

If so, Roxas would have been with Sora for nearly a year.

How much time was Sora missing? He didn't know. Roxas had done something to Sora's memories, making it so Sora hadn't noticed the missing time. Not until Riku had confronted him about it, and even then, all Sora had were fragments of that one night. It wasn't much to go on.

"When did you wake up?" Sora asked Roxas, figuring maybe he could be useful in answering some basic questions. "You messed with my head so much that I can't figure it out."

Roxas was silent Maybe he didn't feel like being helpful. But then, slowly, he said, "I guess the first time was when you were in the hospital, after Ansem tried to shatter your soul. But it's hard to say. It didn't happen all at once."

That matched up with his theory, then. But it didn't make much sense anyway. Why put another soul in Sora? Ansen had thought Sora was useless. He hadn't even known that Sora had powers, let alone what they were. How useful they were.

No. Ansem hadn't done this.

Sora didn't know how Roxas was messing with his memories, either. That seemed like a whole other power. Usually they came one to a person, and the chances that Roxas was a meta like Sora, able to use others' powers, were really slim-

He was interrupted from this train of thought when Riku opened the door and came down the stairs.

"You two were talking," Riku said. "I could hear you from the kitchen," he added.

"Like old friends," Roxas said, with a grin. Or, he showed Sora's teeth, anyway.

Riku didn't look visibly disturbed. Maybe it was easier for him, when Roxas was mean. At least he had to know it wasn't Sora.

"Kairi'll be down in a minute with food," Riku said. "I just wanted to check on something, first. I have a theory." He leaned in towards Sora, and pressed one hand against Sora's chest.

"What are you checking?" Sora blurted out before he realized that he had control of his body again.

Riku was engrossed in his powers, though, and didn't respond.

The door to the upstairs opened, letting in a bit of light. Sora looked up at it, expecting to see Kairi with lunch. Instead, though, a man with firetruck-red hair walked quietly down the stairs. Sora opened his mouth to say something, and Roxas snapped it shut. The man grinned at him, a big wide grin that looked sort of familiar.

Then Sora placed him. He looked different in street clothes than he did in the Organization's coat, but that grin- it was unmistakable. Axel. That was his name. Power over fire- not the strongest member of the Organization, but not a pushover, either. Sora would have had scars from the last time they fought, except that Riku's powers meant that Sora would never scar again.

Riku's brow furrowed, and Roxas returned his gaze to Riku, carefully avoiding looking at Axel.

For what felt like the millionth time, Sora tried to fight off Roxas' control. For what felt like the millionth time, he failed. If he could just warn Riku, could do anything-

But he couldn't.

Out of the corner of his eye, Sora could see Axel lean over, pick something up. Oh god, he had that pipe- the one Kairi had nearly given Sora and Roxas a concussion with earlier. He walked the remaining three steps to where Riku was hunched over, raised the pipe, and -

Riku's hand whipped up quicker than Sora could make out, and stopped the descending pipe as if it were made of paper- even crumpling it a bit.

"I'm not stupid," Riku said, turning around. "I knew that wasn't Kairi coming down those stairs. You walk heavier than her."

Axel just grinned. "This is more fun, anyway," he said. "I've been thinking for days what I would do to you when I found you."

Sora's heart was beating fast, and he felt like something had settled on his chest. Roxas was panicking again. Why? This was a rescue attempt, wasn't it? Shouldn't Roxas be happy?

But there was no time to think about that. Suddenly all the cardboard boxes and junk in the basement burst into flames. Roxas squinted against the sudden bright light, and then grinned. He was still panicked, still had that horrible weight on his chest- but the weight seemed to weigh less now.

Roxas breathed in. Sora wasn't sure, but it seemed like the flames got less intense when he did. Or, at least- dimmer. Then he breathed out, and they returned to normal.

Then Roxas grabbed the chain of the handcuffs, and at the touch of his hands the metal melted away, suddenly red hot. But it didn't hurt when the hot metal dripped onto Sora's arm. Huh. Heat apparently didn't hurt Roxas. Sora didn't see how that had anything to do with light. Powers were sometimes weird, though.

Riku was still turned towards Axel. Roxas stood, and punched him. It didn't seem to do much, besides hurt Sora's hand. He wasn't even making a fist right- if he'd had any power behind it, he would have broken his thumb. But despite how much the punch sucked, it got Riku's attention away from Axel.

Riku had already shown that he could beat Roxas in a fight. What the heck was the point of that move? Did Roxas think that he could beat Riku now? Why? Sure, Roxas had access to his powers better, surrounded by all this bright fire- but he'd been at full strength when Riku had first captured him, and he hadn't won then.

Riku could take both Roxas and Axel. Sora was sure of it. And while he wasn't exactly looking forward to getting beaten up, it was better than Roxas getting free.

"Sora," Riku said. "I'm sorry." Then he took a swing at Sora. At Roxas.

Roxas rolled out of the way. He closed his eyes, shoved his hand at Riku, doing the same trick he'd done the last time they fought- but Riku was wise to his game, and shoved Roxas clear across the basement before he had a chance to let out a burst of light in Riku's face.

Roxas slumped against the wall, the breath knocked out of him by the impact. He watched, still utterly panicked.

Axel and Riku fought. Riku kept making to grab Axel, but Axel would then let off a burst of flame that would force Riku to let go. It was a weird fight. Riku would have the upper hand, if Axel would just stop moving. Sora couldn't remember Axel ever moving that quickly when they'd fought before, and Sora had fought him several times.

But then- if Axel knew that Roxas was the Organization's spy, he might have gone easy on Sora. After all, it wasn't like Sora was going to kill Axel- Sora was one of the good guys. They didn't do things like that. And a dead spy was no good to anyone...

Sora hated this. How much of his life was a lie? Presumably everything before a year or so ago was fine- because Sora hadn't even known the Organization existed back then- but anything after that had to be suspect. He'd been a double agent and he hadn't even known it.

Riku failed to dodge one of Axel's bursts of flame. His right arm was badly burnt. Sora couldn't see how badly from all the way across the basement. Roxas, still recovering from his impact with the wall, took a shaky breath, and coughed against the smoke. Sora's vision swam a little, and he realized that it wasn't just the breath that had been knocked out of him- he'd hit his head, too. Everything had hurt so much that it hadn't stood out against the general pain until now.

His eyes closed. Sora raged. He needed to see this. Needed to see if Riku was okay.

Roxas slumped over. The sound of battle stopped. The heat from the flames vanished.

And the last thing Sora heard, before he finally succumbed to unconsciousness, was a voice saying, "It's alright. Don't worry. You're safe now, Roxas."


	3. The kill

**Chapter 3: The kill**

* * *

><p>Sora woke in pain. He tried to move, and found that he couldn't. Right. Roxas must be awake too, then. Sora wasn't in charge.<p>

Sora tried to remember the last thing that had happened, and found that he couldn't. There had been a fight. He remembered Axel and Riku battling. But what had happened after that?

With a pained hiss, Roxas finally opened his eyes.

It was bright. That was the only impression Sora got, for the first few seconds. Bright like he hadn't seen in days. Gosh, maybe as much as a week. He'd lost count of how long it had been, stuck in that basement.

Then Roxas blinked a couple times, and his eyes adjusted.

He was in a room that was all windows. Some sort of sun room, Sora supposed. Light streamed in from every direction, and even weak late-fall sunshine seemed really bright right now.

"Axel?" Roxas croaked. And Sora remembered smoke, and how it had burned his lungs. Right. There had been fire. There had been Axel.

Everything hurt, but out of all the pain, his head hurt most. Sora couldn't remember hurting it. Had Roxas been messing with his memories again?

No, wait. Sora knew this. Head injuries sometimes came prepackaged with their own memory-messing-up...ness. And from that mental sentence, he knew that he wasn't thinking super clearly, either.

Hopefully Roxas was feeling that, too, Sora thought bitterly. Since it was probably all his fault.

"Axel?" Roxas called out, again, a little louder. "Are you here?"

Sora was under covers. He was really warm, and he kind of wanted to go back to bed.

Roxas sat up, and even though it wasn't very fast, it made Sora dizzy. There was a jingling noise, and Roxas looked down. The melted half-of-a-pair-of-handcuffs was still on his wrist, the end of the chain a melted and re-solidified mess. Roxas looked at his hand, then- his other hand. He turned it over and looked at his palm, as though surprised that it was uninjured. Had he really not done that trick with the heat before?

Sora actually wasn't that surprised. The thing about superpowers was, you didn't always know what you could do with them until you had to do it- and then you either found out your capabilities were more than you thought they were, or- well- you didn't.

It hadn't been life-or-death for Roxas. Not this time. But apparently Roxas had been pretty invested in the whole escaping thing.

The thing was- Sora could understand why. He could imagine being trapped in that basement, because he'd been there. But Sora had had faith that he'd get out of there, free in his own body again. Roxas, on the other hand, had just been waiting for someone to figure out how to kill him without hurting Sora. It had to have been a nightmare for him.

Sora shouldn't have cared what it was like for Roxas. Roxas was the enemy. Roxas was possessing him. Roxas was terrible to Sora's friends, had tried to hurt Kairi, was part of the Organization that had nearly done worse than any of that to Riku.

But Roxas was afraid of the dark, and he had a best friend, and he had been alone in that basement with no hope of escaping on his own. Roxas was too human to hate. Sora wouldn't go as far as to say that he liked him- there was too much animosity between them for that- but it was hard to outright hate him.

Sora had a plan for what to do about getting out of here already. He'd wait until he was back at full strength. Then, he'd wait for a chance when Roxas was sleeping. It seemed like sometimes Sora woke up before Roxas. He'd high-tail it back to Riku's place, and that would be that. He was sure Riku had been on the verge of figuring out what to do about Roxas. It would be a piece of cake. Roxas thought he had Sora 100% under control right now. He wouldn't take precautions.

Sora would only get one chance at this. But he was pretty sure he could do it.

Too bad he couldn't teleport. That would be an awesome power to have. He would just have to wait for a moment of inattention on Roxas's part, and zap, he'd be back at Riku's place. He'd have to make friends with someone who had that power ASAP. It would be so useful.

"Axel!" Roxas rasped again, and when no reply came, he slumped down onto the bed again and closed his eyes.

The door opened a moment later. Roxas's eyes opened in time to see Axel come into the room. "I thought I heard you," he said. "I'm glad you're awake." He smiled, and it actually looked sincere.

Oh. So Axel was Roxas' friend. The one who didn't trust him.

Roxas frowned. "I think I have a concussion or something. And a bit of retrograde amnesia."

Ah-ha. That had been the phrase Sora had been searching for, a moment earlier. Retrograde amnesia.

Then Roxas seemed to cut herself off. "What about you, Axel? You rescued me. Are you hurt? What exactly happened? Why did you even come? Riku could have killed you. When you showed up I was so worried."

Axel gave him a look. "Me? I'm fine. You're the one who was locked up in a basement for a week and a half surrounded by enemies. And then, to make it all better, I botched the rescue attempt and nearly killed you myself with all the smoke I made."

Roxas scoffed, and it turned into a cough, as though to prove Axel right. If Sora had been awake, the cough would have healed in moments. Roxas didn't have Riku's healing powers like Sora did, though.

"The rest of the Organization thought you were dead," Axel said. "But you know I like proving them wrong. It's the only fun I get around here." His tone was carefully light. "I hired a healer, by the way. You aren't actually concussed. Just bruised. You'll be fine." Then, a little too casually, he added, "You looked fine otherwise," Axel said. "No bruises. No scars. You're in better condition than I expected."

"Yeah," Roxas said. "I let Sora out for a bit, when I needed to heal."

Axel frowned. "If you need to talk about it-" he started.

"No. It's- they didn't really hurt me much. Except the one time. I nearly escaped. We fought. They didn't- they wouldn't have wanted to hurt Sora."

Axel nodded. "Good. I was worried- Never mind. It doesn't matter. I'm just glad you're okay."

"You thought they were going to torture me," Roxas said.

Sora wanted to shout out, "What?" As if Riku and Kairi would torture anyone. Roxas had to know that they were nice people. He'd been spying on them long enough, after all.

Axel didn't answer. He just stared at Roxas. Sora didn't know him well enough to guess what he was thinking. Then he seemed to shake off whatever thoughts he was having, and said, "Xemnas will want a report on everything. The usual."

Roxas let out a little, hollow laugh. "Like I learned anything, trapped in the dark there. Except that I'm not cut out for actual combat."

Axel shook his head. "You haven't had much practice. That's all. I've been fighting since I joined the Organization. You've been spying. Your role is important, too."

"Some spy I am," Roxas said. "I got caught."

"It was bound to happen sooner or later," Axel said. "No one's perfect. But hey, everything will be okay now. You'll have a little time to recover before you get another mission, and then we can get back to work. Nothing has really changed."

"Right," Roxas said." He shook his head. "I'm going to get the rest of these handcuffs off. Can you stand back for a sec?"

Axel did so, and Roxas held up his left arm, handcuffs and all, and pointed his right index finger at them.

The laser beam that came out of his finger melted through the handcuffs easily, and also looked kind of stupid, like they were in a comic book or something. Not that Sora really had any right to talk. He was sure that he looked like he was from a comic book himself, when he used Riku's super-strength.

Then Roxas stood shakily, and said, "I need a shower. I must reek."

Axel made no argument to that. He walked Roxas to the bathroom as though afraid he might break, and said, "Shout if you fall down or something."

Roxas glared at him. Axel just shrugged. "You have a head injury. It could happen."

Roxas made it through the shower uneventfully, though. Shampooing his head hurt like heck, but Sora was glad to get the grime and- was that blood? It was- out of his hair.

Being clean was kind of spoiled by wearing clothes that Sora had never seen before, and which he was sure Roxas must have bought with Sora's own money at some point. It was like having his face rubbed in the fact that he wasn't in control at all. Again.

He ignored that. He focused on spying, on paying close attention to the house they were in. It was some kind of safe house, he'd gathered over the past half-hour or so. It wasn't Roxas' first time here, because he didn't seem curious at all about his surroundings.

Once Roxas was dressed, Axel found him. With a grim expression, he said, "Xemnas wants to see you now."

"Already?" Roxas asked. But then he just shook his head. "I'll go." He put on his shoes and made for the door of his room.

"Roxas?" Axel said, as Roxas walked out of his room.

"Yeah?"

"Be careful, okay?"

Roxas shrugged, and left.

The safe house looked mostly like an old house, with a living room and bedrooms. Roxas's room was on the second floor. That was most of what Sora got to spy on, in the moments Roxas walked around. The first floor looked just like an old house, in need of serious redecorating but not otherwise notable. Outside the windows, Sora saw a large yard, and other houses down the block. It looked like suburbs, still. Good. He'd known that the Organization couldn't be too far from the main city, but it was nice to have some confirmation.

Roxas stepped outside. They were on a main road, but it wasn't one Sora recognized. Must not be the northwest suburbs, then. Sora knew those too well to be lost.

There was a cluster of office buildings across the way. Roxas tucked his hands into the pockets of his jeans, and, after waiting for a couple cars, crossed the street and went into the closest one.

Sora wasn't sure what he'd expected of the Organization. A huge imposing lair, maybe. He realized now that that didn't make sense. He and Riku had been fighting the Organization wherever they found them for the past year, and they'd never figured out where they were meeting. Anything that stood out would have been way too obvious.

In any case, it looked like any other office building. There was a reception desk, though no one was sitting at it, and there were a couple chairs for people to sit in while they waited. A couple of signs made it clear that this was a doctor's office, and that the receptionist would be back "momentarily".

Roxas took the elevator. There didn't seem to be any security in the building, which made sense when Sora thought about it. The Organization was an evil league of supers. They didn't need security- they were each deadly to the average human being.

The elevator was slow. Sora could still feel every bruise that Riku had inflicted on Roxas during their last fight. He remembered what Roxas had said, before- that he'd "let Sora out" when he needed to heal. Sora was sure there was more to it than that, though- Roxas hadn't just let Sora out for that reason. He'd wanted conversation, and Sora wasn't so sure he could keep Sora locked in this corner of his mind indefinitely anyway. Ansem hadn't had full control of Riku's body until Riku was nearly gone. And Sora wasn't gone. Not even close yet.

If Riku didn't rescue Sora fast, Sora would just figure out a way to rescue himself.

The elevator dinged when it reached the top floor. Roxas stepped out into a huge white room.

The space in the room was bigger on the inside than the building had looked outside. Sora was no architect, but he had a feeling the dimensions of the building didn't add up right. Like, maybe someone in the Organization had space-manipulating powers. That was a scary thought. Then again, maybe the building was just bigger than it looked. It wasn't like Sora had been able to get a good look when he couldn't even control the direction his eyeballs were pointing.

Sitting at a desk at the end of the room was a man of indeterminate age. His hair was gray, but his face was fairly youthful. "Ah," he said. "Roxas."

"Xemnas," Roxas replied, tone edging close to impolite but not quite there.

What followed was pretty dull. Roxas told Xemnas how he'd been captured, and about what he'd learned during his imprisonment. Not much, Sora was happy to hear, though he'd pretty much known that already.

"I have a mission for you now," Xemnas said, once Roxas had finished his short report.

Roxas frowned, but didn't complain.

Xemnas passed a folder to Roxas. "The details are in here. Finish up quickly. This will be your only mission for today."

Roxas nodded.

Half an hour later, after reading the report and throwing it on his bed back in his room, Roxas was standing on a nearby corner, catching the cross-town bus. Sora shouldn't have been surprised by the bus- why would Roxas know how to drive?

He kept himself all hunched over the whole time, with his hood up. Sora could tell he didn't like public transportation.

They passed a few landmarks Sora knew, which meant he could place the Organization's headquarters as being only about a half hour drive from his house. There was a warehouse district in between, where not many people went these days. Sora's mom had explained it when Sora was little- something about the manufacturing jobs going to the mainland, and nothing being left on the island. Abandoned warehouses bordered the river, and there were old disused docks there, which had long ago been replaced by others further down the river, towards the coast.

The docks were where Roxas found Xemnas' thug, after a bit of a walk from the bus stop. Scotch was his name, and he didn't look like much of a threat. He was skinny, arms poking out of his loose green t-shirt like twigs, and his legs didn't look much better- his jeans looked like they were falling off of him. Sora thought, with a little relief, that Roxas wouldn't have too much trouble beating him. Not that Sora wanted anyone to be captured by the Organization, even one of its former goons, but he also didn't want Roxas to die and take Sora with him.

He hoped the Organization didn't treat prisoners too badly. He had a feeling they probably weren't very forgiving, though, to those who betrayed them.

Scotch saw Roxas only a second after Roxas spotted him.

"I was wondering who they'd send after me," Scotch said. "Thought I'd at least merit someone with real powers."

Roxas ignored the insult. "You going to come quietly, or are we going to do this the hard way?" he asked.

Scotch just laughed. "Kid, you're in way over your head. Just because you're a full member of the Organization doesn't mean you actually know what you're doing. What are you, fifteen?"

Sora was seventeen, and his birthday was in less than a month. He felt Roxas bristle slightly at that insult, but he still did his best to ignore it.

Did Roxas even have a birthday? Gosh, what if he actually _was_ fifteen? What if Sora was being possessed by someone really young? Roxas certainly didn't seem any older than Sora- didn't seem a lot younger, either, though, so probably he was around the same age. Sora wasn't sure why that was a relief, but it was.

"Guess you're choosing the hard way," Roxas said, pulling his hoodie off and tossing it to the ground. He stepped a step back into the sun, where, Sora remembered a second later, Roxas's powers would be stronger.

The little bit of eye-dazzling that came from stepping into sunlight was all that Scotch was waiting for. He moved, fast enough that Sora didn't see what he was doing. There was a boom, and it was only as Roxas stared down at the sudden bullet hole in his stomach that Sora realized that movement had been Scotch pulling a gun from the back of his pants.

Roxas dropped to his knees, hand covering the wound. The pain was intense. Sora had felt worse, but not recently.

_Ansem reaching _into_ his chest, grabbing something vital, something that should have been intangible, and shattering it-_

He hadn't thought about guns. Hadn't remembered that, hey, regular people could be just as deadly as supers.

Scotch walked over to where Roxas had now collapsed onto the ground. Roxas made a feeble move to point his finger at Scotch. Sora recognized the move from earlier- Roxas's dorky-looking laser beam.

Scotch stepped on his hand, hard. There was an audible snapping sound, and Sora knew that at least one finger was broken.

They weren't getting out of this one. Sora might have managed, but Roxas wasn't a fighter. He didn't have superstrength or any sort of healing powers. And Sora could feel Roxas's pain, could feel that there was no way he could even stand up, let alone fight back.

"Doesn't seem like the hard way to me," Scotch said, laughing a little. Sora felt sick. Any trace of sympathy he felt for Scotch disappeared.

Scotch lowered his gun again, pointing it directly at Sora's head. At Roxas's head. "Any last words?"

"Sora," Roxas said, voice pleading.

And then Sora was in control for the first time since the basement. There was no time to think, no time to plan a good course of action.

He sat up, took another bullet to the shoulder when Scotch missed, and _punched_.

Sora would never be as strong as Riku. Riku was bigger, and Sora had a feeling that the way his powers worked, they were never as strong as the person he was copying them from.

It didn't make a lot of difference. Sora wasn't up against Riku. He was up against a non-super, and even with such a poor angle, his punch made Scotch bend over double, wheezing.

Sora's pinky was still broken, but as Scotch watched, unable to move, it popped back into position, and healed. It was a little bloody, and Sora didn't want to think about bone poking through his skin, but he did anyway. The bullet holes closed slightly more slowly, but within a moment they were gone, too. One bullet, which had apparently been lodged in his shoulder, popped out on its own and clinked to the ground.

Scotch looked afraid. Normally, Sora didn't like inspiring that expression. Right now, though, he was okay with it.

Sora stood, and rolled his shoulders a little. The pain was gone now. He reached out and plucked Scotch's gun from his hand without much effort. He didn't need superstrength, even. He carefully crushed the end of the barrel, and then tossed it far away in case Scotch got any ideas about it. Sora didn't know anything about guns, but if there was any chance that that gun was still remotely useful, he wasn't letting Scotch get hold of it.

Scotch said, "please." That was the only word he could get out.

Sora said, "I'm not like you. I don't kill people."

Scotch looked relieved, though he still couldn't get another word out.

And then Roxas was in charge again. He said, "I'm turning you in to Xemnas. We'll let him decide what to do with you."

Scotch wheezed, nodded.

"The healing thing is just between us," Roxas said. "Understood?"

Scotch nodded again. Roxas picked his hoodie up from the dirty ground and pulled it on, carefully zipping it all the way up.

The Organization sent a car to pick up Roxas and Scotch, so Roxas didn't have to take the bus back with Scotch in tow. Sora had never minded taking the bus- his school district didn't have money for school buses, so he'd taken the city bus to school every day of high school- but he could tell Roxas didn't like it. He wasn't sure why. Maybe he was worried, this close to Sora's house, that someone might recognize him. Maybe he just hated public transit.

Sora hoped his mom had put up posters of him or something- he was missing, after all. Depending on how much Riku had told her, he might have been considered missing for nearly two weeks now. Maybe someone would see Roxas and call Sora's mom, who might tell Riku what was happening, and this whole mess could get sorted out.

He kept an eye out, as much as he could, for any such signs. He didn't see any. It was kind of a longshot, anyway.

Scotch seemed to recover slightly on the trip back, from what Sora heard of his breathing on the drive back. Roxas was in the front seat and Scotch the back, so it wasn't like Sora could see him, though.

Roxas reported to Xemnas briefly, leaving out all the parts where Sora had saved his butt. Sora guessed it would look bad that Roxas'd had to rely on Sora's powers to survive a fight with a non-super.

And then Roxas went back to his room in the safe house, shut the door, and locked it. He pulled the hoodie off, then his bullet-hole-ridden shirt. There was blood around each hole. Roxas examined Sora's stomach, his shoulder- places he'd been shot. There were no scars, of course. Sora didn't scar anymore.

Roxas slumped to the floor, shirt still in hand. He leaned against his bed, and took a few deep breaths.

Sora might have said something comforting, in other circumstances. And if he'd had control of his own mouth, to talk with. As it was, that wasn't even an option.

Roxas sat there for a long time, freaking out, but it couldn't last forever. After a long while, there was a knock on the door. Roxas said, "Give me a sec!" and threw the ruined shirt in the trash, burying it under a couple tissues and other garbage. Then he pulled the hoodie back on, zipped it, and opened the door.

It was Axel, who leaned against the door-frame, and said: "Thought you might want to know- that guy you just apprehended is dead."

Roxas blinked. "What?"

"Internal bleeding," Axel said carelessly. "He died a couple hours after you brought him in."

Roxas repeated, "What?"

"It happens sometimes," Axel said. "If you punch someone really hard in the stomach. Nothing you could have known about, but I thought I'd let you know so you weren't caught unaware by it." He paused, added, "I know some people in the Organization aren't... very sensitive."

"You're saying I killed someone," Roxas said, slowly.

Axel hesitated.

Roxas cursed. "Why didn't someone get him a healer? A doctor? There was plenty of time."

"No one knew he needed one until the bleeding had just about killed him," Axel said.

"Shit," Roxas said.

"Xemnas is happy," Axel said, as though that were the problem. "It's just one less loose end."

This did not make Roxas any less upset. Sora felt like he was going to be sick, and he wasn't sure if it was him feeling that way, or Roxas. Probably Roxas- he had Sora's body tightly under control, so his reactions were probably the ones Sora was feeling. Not that Sora wasn't upset- but he was having trouble telling _how_ upset, exactly, he was, with only Roxas's feedback from his body, and not his own. It was weird. Sora had thought, before he knew about Roxas, that emotional states probably came straight from the soul. After all, Sora knew that souls existed as a fact. But he guessed it was more complicated than that, because he couldn't tell how upset he was, and his soul was fine. It was just his body Roxas had.

Sora hated this. It wasn't the first time he'd thought that, but it hit him now with a lot of force. He hated being so out-of-control. In some ways, it would have been better if he'd stayed asleep while Roxas took over. It would have been easier, anyway.

Roxas would be dead if Sora weren't awake. _Sora_ would be dead if Sora weren't awake. If Sora couldn't heal himself, he was just as vulnerable to injury as anyone else.

He could have died, easily, today. Funny, that he couldn't feel shocked or panicked about it. He felt so disconnected from himself.

Roxas had been very quiet this whole time. Axel said, "You okay?"

Roxas shook his head. "I'm fine," he said.

"You've never killed anyone before," Axel said.

Again, Roxas just shook his head. "I'm fine," he repeated, a little flatly. "I just- I need a little time. It hasn't sunk in."

"Okay," Axel said. "I- okay. Just- find me if you need me, okay? I don't have any missions lined up for the rest of the day."

"Alright," Roxas said.

Axel hesitated a little longer, hovering in the doorway. Then he left. Roxas shut the door carefully, then collapsed on the bed.

"You've never killed anyone either," he said. "How's it feel?"

It took Sora a minute to realize he had control again.

"I have," he said, quietly.

Roxas raised one eyebrow, which was a weird sensation when Sora was otherwise in control.

"Ansem," Sora said. "You forget, I had to kill him to get Riku his body back."

"That wasn't killing," Roxas said. "I was there, watching. You just touched him, and Riku was in control again. Took about three seconds."

"I shattered his soul," Sora said. "That's the part you couldn't see. He was latched on to Riku's soul like a leech or something. There was no way to detach them without killing both, so I just- grabbed, and squeezed. Ansem's soul is in a million little pieces. He's still attached to Riku, still in his body and attached to his soul, but there's nothing left of him big enough to grab control."

"Oh," Roxas said. "I thought you just- superpowered him back to his body, or something. I wasn't- I wasn't as in control back then, as I am now. I slept a lot. I didn't get the whole story."

Sora said, "It's okay. I don't talk about it much. You wouldn't have known, I guess."

Roxas shouldn't have known any of it. If he didn't live in Sora's head, he wouldn't know anything at all.

Sora had never talked to anyone about that day, not even Riku. Sora guessed Riku knew that Ansem was still inside him- after all, he still had all of Ansem's powers, and there wasn't really any other explanation for that. And since he had Ansem's soul powers, he could look at himself and see what was happening. It wasn't exactly a secret. But they'd never discussed it. Sora wasn't sure Riku could even remember exactly what had happened, when he was possessed.

"How did you even use Ansem's soul powers?" Roxas asked. "I thought your powers were like... friendship-based, or something like that. Ansem wasn't your friend. I always wondered how that worked."

Sora thought for a moment before responding, but couldn't think of a way for Roxas to use the information against him. "Riku is my friend," he finally said. "And they were attached." More than attached, they had been the same person at that moment- had been literally joined at the soul. Sora remembered the mess he'd had, the trouble even finding Ansem's parasitic soul among the wreckage of Riku's soul.

"Sounds like a technicality to me," Roxas said.

"Sometimes technicalities can save your life," Sora said. "Anyway. I think shattering someone's soul is worse than killing them. If you kill them, they're just gone. If they're shattered..."

"He shattered you, first," Roxas said. "Was it- did it hurt?"

Sora didn't want to talk about it. So he said, "There would have had to be something left of me, for it to hurt." He tried to make his tone as final as possible.

Roxas didn't take the hint. He said, "Then how did you fix yourself?"

Sora said, "I don't want to talk about it, okay? It was hard. It took weeks, and I was in a coma the whole time, and-"

He was breathing hard.

"I never wanted to kill anyone ever again," he blurted out. "I thought- I thought my secret identity would be enough, that no one would ever know who I was, that no one would ever come after me or Riku again."

"I never had a secret identity," Roxas said quietly. "I've just always been me, and I... I didn't have an identity, period. They could make me do whatever. Not like I'm a person, right?" He paused, but didn't give Sora a chance to say anything. Then, louder, he said, "I wouldn't even have my own name if-"

He paused for another moment, apparently unsure if he should go on. Then he shook his head, obviously deciding Sora wasn't a threat. "I wouldn't have my own name," he continued, "if Axel hadn't given me one. It was while you were in the hospital last year, in a coma. Fixing your soul after Ansem broke it, I guess. Anyway. Ansem had names for me, but they weren't- weren't real names. He called me the freak, sometimes. Ansem was really into his soul powers, so it really pissed them off that he couldn't seem to use them on me. Because I don't have a soul, apparently."

Roxas stated this all matter-of-fact, but Sora could tell it all pained him. He could feel it.

Roxas shook his head. "Anyway. Axel was my guard. They knew something was weird about you, mostly because I existed, but they didn't know you were a meta. Axel was overkill, they thought, but he's always been a bit of a wildcard, and I guess they wanted him out of the way for a while. So he was my guard. And when I was awake, we talked. He said, if I wasn't you, I needed a name. So he called me Roxas. It's just your name, jumbled up. With an X in it. Because he said, I was ex-Sora... It made more sense at the time, I guess."

He said, "Axel told me everything the Organization knew about you. Even before you woke up, we figured I'd be taking over your life. Not as a spy, just as my identity. There was no reason to spy on you, then. You seemed brain-dead when I wasn't awake, and they weren't even sure I had powers. That came later. You don't have to have powers to be part of the Organization."

"Why are you telling me all this?" Sora asked, when Roxas finally gave him back control, and he could get a word in edgewise.

Roxas took a long moment to reply. Finally, he said: "I know you, even though you don't know me very well yet. And- I trust you, even if that's sort of nuts. Besides, it's not like you're ever going to have a chance to betray me. Uh."

That feeling of trust wasn't mutual. Not now, not ever, Sora vowed. But he could tell Roxas was sincere. There was a warm sort of feeling in his chest, and he knew it belonged to Roxas. He found himself resenting that feeling. He didn't want to know how Roxas felt. He didn't want to get to know him. He wanted Roxas gone, banished back to wherever he belonged. (Not dead though, Sora'd had enough killing. First Ansem and now Scotch, and Sora had known when he realized that he was a meta that people might try to kill him, but he hadn't thought that through and realized that he might have to kill to survive. He hadn't _wanted_ to think it though.)

It wasn't Roxas's fault, though. None of it was. If it had been Sora who woke up in that hospital room, alone and friendless and without even a name, wouldn't he have latched on to the first person who was nice to him? Maybe he would have joined the Organization too, until he was in so deep that he couldn't get out.

He was glad it hadn't been him. He was sure it would have broken him, to be so alone.

This was exactly what he hadn't wanted to do. Sympathy was the last thing he needed to feel for Roxas.

This was all temporary, anyway. Even if Sora couldn't find a way free on his own, Riku would come for him. Sora just had to wait. And, well, Sora didn't like waiting, but he knew Riku would never leave him here alone. Friends didn't do that. Kairi would help too- she was the smart one. Sora had always been a little naïve and never done well at school, and Riku was fine with book smarts but he was dumb enough to get possessed by the first person to try to use him for his powers. But Kairi- she had it all. Sora had always admired her for that.

Sora missed them both so much it hurt, and that was kind of a relief- that he could still feel something. It didn't make things okay, but it made them a little better than the numbness he'd been feeling.

He still hoped Riku would come soon. He didn't want to have to kill anyone else.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Scotch is named after a VERY minor FF7 villain.


End file.
